Historically, in every era or situation of difficulties, perplexities and emergencies, women and children are usually the most vulnerable segments of society that bear the greatest brunt of agonies. As mothers, what affects children is felt more by women, because, women are the natural custodians of children. In this regard, the first plight of women is the fact that they are rarely appreciated for the burdens they bear and the sacrifices they make on behalf of children and men.
Burden and agonies which women bear and sacrifices which they make are not always physical or visible but more in terms of empathy or inner feelings, which can be quite traumatic and long-lasting. Emilia, wife to Lago in Shakespeare’s Othello, would tell us that men are “all about stomachs, and we all but food; they eat us hungerly, and when they are full, they belch us”.
It is usually during situations of emergencies such as recession that men with large stomachs often belch women after eating them hungerly when times were rosy. Agonies arising from failed relationships and broken homes affect the psyche of women more than the men. In a situation of separation, children usually opt to stay with mothers, thus, in a recession, single-parent homes become quite rampant. But who cares!
With an erosion of the extended family system, fueled more by recession, coupled with job losses, a large number of women are going through serious agonies which some of them would rarely discuss freely with anyone. A private investigation revealed that even when women in agonies turn to churches for succour, they often meet further dangers and abuses, details of which cannot be made public here.
Men have been known to abscond from their homes, leaving wife and children alone and taking shelter somewhere else, unknown to their family. Reasons which such men give for leaving wives and children range from loss of jobs, financial difficulties etc, to intolerable nagging habits of their wives. On the part of the women, there is also a trend where the sustaining juice of love is tied to affluence and comfort.
Large families are definitely hardest hit by the current recession, because to feed, educate and maintain, many children can be quite difficult. When unwanted pregnancies come, it is usually the women who bear the anxiety and agony most, a situation which can lead to nagging, maltreatment or virginal “fencing”.
Loss of self-esteem arising from job losses and reduction is social status can lead to several other plight, both for women and men too. Ailing health can also arise from strains, insufficient nourishment and worries. Problems of adaptation, adjustment and having to cope with the consequences of recession can be quite demanding. Even children in the home can be severely affected in many ways, including become way-ward.
Falling from grace to grass which recession can bring about, is a plight of its own. For the women, when such fall in status is accompanied by a rejection or lukewarm relationship from a loved one, the trauma can be quite severe. The phenomenon of drug addiction arises largely as a response to shocks and trauma whereby an individual looks for means of finding solace. It takes a strong woman to remain stable in crisis.
Declerambault’s Syndrome is a mild psychological aberration which can arise from a sad experience of being rejected by a loved one, because of challenges which recession can bring about. Not many people can remain true friends when conditions get hard, and similarly, not many women can remain stable when there is a fall in status, fallowed by a rejection by somebody they loved and trusted.
People who have gone through some shock, especially being rejected by a loved one, can turn passionately to somebody else who is able to provide an emotional succor at a critical time of need. Such new-found relationship can go to the point of idolization and irrational attachment to a man who may not be quite so serious. A woman may be so carried away by the sermon of a clergy man, that she can instantly get fixated on the man. This is an example of what psychiatrists would call Declerambault’s Syndrome.
Good as religion is, that tendency where it becomes an opium, especially in a time of recession, cannot be regarded as ideal. Definitely, many unsuspecting, heart-broken women, have become victims of some false prophets that have become numerous in Nigeria. There are lots of women who have had lots of sad experiences which they would be relieved to share with appropriate authorities that can help them.
Ministry of Women’s Affairs, Social Welfare outfits and the Federation of Women Lawyers, among other bodies, should please come to the rescue of many women in the point of disorientation arising from abandonment. They are left to fend for children.
Dr. Amirize is a retired lecturer, Rivers State University, Port Harcourt.

Bright Amirize